The latest in the shot saga...

In April I had no pain at all. But this past week I've had the worst pain yet, for the longest period of time...five days this time. After having no pain in April, though, I thought I'd wait to see if I had pain in May before I got the shot of Methotrexate. Thankfully I had someone tell me their experience with it and heard of a couple of others who have taken it and they had all been fine with no side effects or problems to speak of. That really calmed my mind, and I was able to be ready to get mentally ready for getting the shot if needed.

The timing of everything around this week was really interesting. I can't see it as anything other than God watching out for me and others, and divinely appointing all of the details...

So, this last week was "the week of pain." Also, Wade came down with a bad cough and fever and the Dr. thinks it's walking Pneumonia so we had a very sad, sick little boy on antibiotics to take care of this week. I was able to get through the first 2 days of pain with the kids but the pain intensified and by Wednesday afternoon I had to call Jim to see if he could come home early. I was in severe pain, in tears, desperate for help. He had a big presentation so thought he couldn't make it until after that, a couple of hours later. But it turned out that one of his coworkers overheard me on the phone and told Jim he'd better get home, and that he and the others would make the presentation for him. He got home after I had gotten the kids down for nap/quiet time and I went right to bed.

Earlier in the morning I had called my mom and she had offered to call the Dr. to see what blood tests, etc. needed to be done to get the ball rolling for the shot. A little while after Jim got home, my pain went away (!) and then right after that the nurse called and said they could get me in for the shot that afternoon in the next hour!

So we hustled everyone into the car, and drove down there. The infusion center had a really nice, caring staff, and had a great patio with a snack bar for Jim and the kids. The boys enjoyed running around and getting treats...it had been a hard week for them, with me sometimes not even able to get up to help them or even talk at times, and certainly not able to do anything extra or creative!

I was in the room for a while getting the shot, and as Jim was getting a second round of snacks for everyone, a lady came up to the snack bar at the same time and said, "I know you! You were fishing next to us last fall with your boys! In fact, we were just talking about you guys as we were fishing last week. We were remembering how your boys would yell, 'congratulations!!' every time someone caught a fish!"

Jim totally remembered them, too, and had had a great conversation with them. Her husband was there for chemo treatments, and this lady asked a few times if she could take Garrett and Wyatt over to see him...he loves chatting with them. So they did, and they had a good time talking to Bill, and at one point Garrett got going on explaining how an engine works (in vivid detail from his car books) and they just loved it. It turns out that Bill was a mechanic and so he loved hearing all the details. I saw them for just a minute as we left, and he told me, "I'll be praying for you. God bless you!" and I was able to say the same thing to him. What an encouragement.

This "chance" meeting really was amazing, and we just had this confirmation that we were supposed to be there that day with those people, and it gave me a lot of peace about the shot and everything I've been going through. I reminds me again that God is in control, and he knows exactly what is going on, and he CARES. I know that I won't always understand why things happen in this world, but I know I can always rest in His care and provision even in the midst of hard times. Hard times don't mean He doesn't care...in fact, He is so good to use those hard times to turn things around for good for those who love Him! I've seen it with Crohn's and the diet and helping others find health, through moving away and being pushed to grow even more in Him and finding joy in resting in Him even when I don't understand, in Post Partum Depression and coming out of it knowing that no matter what I face I can rest in His provision, and see it yet again in this circumstance.

I think it was amazing that the pain went away just in time for me to get down there to get the shot! I thought it was gone, but it turned out to return again really strong in the middle of the night and then I couldn't get out of bed all morning so Jim stayed home Thursday. Cousin David came that night to stay with us while he taught a class in Denver. It was so nice to have him! I was able to make it through Friday with almost no pain and then it returned in the afternoon so Jim came home a little early again and I stayed in bed all afternoon and evening. Saturday it was gone! :) So we had a nice time at the Butterfly Pavilion and getting pizza.

The Methotrexate should work within 2 weeks, and I'm really glad that I'll be able to go to the follow-up appointment with my mom when she and dad are visiting at the beginning of June. June 3rd we'll find out by ultrasound if the mass was dissolved by the shot, and if not we'll have to consider surgery. I'm thinking I can't deal with this pain much longer; it throws the whole family off to have me down like this. So, we'll talk about whether I'll need a hysterectomy if that's a safer surgery than trying to remove the mass in a dangerous location. It's a big deal, but we have to do something pretty soon because I dread the "week of pain" every month now, and it's hard to have it affect everyone. Praying for wisdom and peace while we wait...